Part 1

It’s 1:30 am and I’m standing around at a servo buzzing away with all these other nutters about to launch on a crazy big ride. What the hell am I doing here and more to the point, how the hell did I get wrapped up in this to start with??????

The Lead up.

Lets step back a few months and take a look at what’s transpired to this point.

20 years ago, back in 2003, 4 crazy blokes decided to ride from Melbourne to Darwin one weekend. That was the first certified 50CC or 50 hours Coast to Coast completed in Australia.
Fatman and LTP thought it a good idea to mark the 20th anniversary of that ride so got in contact with the original ride leader, Derrick, who also thought it was a great idea..
On the 12 of Jan, 2023, Fatman posted up on the forum and planning for the 20th anniversary ride kicked off with people being asked to express an interest in participating. Group start at 2am, 25th of August 2023. Derrick was designated to lead the group out of the servo, then each rider switches to their own ride plan. Everyone is different. (cue Monty Python)

I’ve harbored a desire to complete a 50CC, just because I can and because I like to ride motorbikes and tour over long distances. I mused over this ride, discussed with the wife and on the 16th of Jan, put my name up as a starter.

Was this ride going to be comfortable? not in my current state (lack) of fitness, both physical and riding wise.

For the next few months, I put together ride plans, rode day runs and spent time sorting out timing issue. I also started at the gym with circuit training and boxing classes to improve physical and mental fitness and put the bottle of booze away for the last 5 weeks leading into the ride.
May and June proved challenging as I was required to travel for work, so with only 6 weeks to go, I managed to squeeze in 2 reasonable length rides. the first being the Silo Arts tour of NSW and the second, Border Run 2023. Both rides went well and proved all systems were go, even the rider might make the grade.

1 week out, I decided to fit an MCCruise to assist in fatigue reduction, fuel efficiency and ensuring I didn’t speed creep in either direction. This turned out to be a really good thing later in the ride!

Thursday, T minus 1 day

We’d decided to have solar panels fitted to the house and the company supplying decided today was a good day to do the installation. Beaut. Not really what I wanted but shit happens. I had the day off work and it gave me a reason to be up early.

In amongst answering questions and signing stuff, I organised my gear and finished packing the bike. By midday, the installers had shot through and with the bike packed, I could lounge around. (read- go over bike for the umpteenth times and rejig the ride plan for the thousandth time) I posted the following on our forum….T minus 9 hours and counting. The lunatic machine is packed. Seeyas there! Yep, in the immortal words of Big Kev, “I’m Excited!!!“

We had dinner very early and I managed to crawl into bed around 6:30pm and grab about 5 hours sleep before the alarm clock woke me. Realistically, I think the nervous energy woke me before the alarm did!

Friday – My Big Dance

Get up, get organised. Bike out of the shed and on the road to meet everyone at the start. Kate is close behind in the car, and like others, will be waving us off on our journey. Many thanks to the crazy LD groupies.

So here we are, back to the opening line, It’s 1:30 am and I’m standing around at a servo buzzing away with all these other nutters about to launch on a crazy big ride. It’s come down to this, all the prep and planning is done and about to unfold. 3770km and 50 hours to get to Darwin. Is it doable? on paper, yes it is. Practically, well, we’re about to find out. Every rider has to ride their own plan and be prepared to pull the pin if the need arises. This is not a ride for egos!

I must’ve been looking nervous. Ox-34 offered me some sage advice. Focus on each tank, not the overall distance. This was useful advice that served me well throughout the ride. Thanks Peter.

Group photo’s done and dusted, start docket obtained and at 2am, Derrick leads us out of the servo to much fanfare of the gathered IBA crowd. This is it.

We navigate the mayhem that is the roadwork riddled freeway out of Melbourne and start to settle into a rhythm. Not sure who’s where or what’s what but I’m on my own schedule now and aiming at the first fuel stop at Tintinara. All good in theory until I notice one of my driving lights pointing in a funny direction. I curse myself for forgetting to tighten bolts and reach out to readjust. Oh bugger. Not a loose bolt but a broken bracket. Servo in sight and out comes the duck tape.

Fixed. I set sail again and hope my Thommo inspired dodge fix will survive until daybreak. It does, then almost on cue, the bracket breaks. I locate a roadside stop and find Derrick trying to grab a bit of shuteye while I perform surgery on the driving light. He regales me with the tale of getting changed just as Fatman and LTP sail past. Quite amusing. Surgery complete and I bid farewell to Derrick. No doubt I’ll catch him again somewhere.

Finally make it to Tintinara and am in love with my auxiliary tank. At least that bit worked well.

I’d prerun the first leg of this ride via Mt Pleasant a couple weeks ago, turning left and taking the route through Gawler. Not liking the slow pace or roadworks encountered last time, I opted to turn right at Mt Pleasant and head up through Eudunda, picking up the Worlds End highway, eventually popping out at Crystal Brook. No roadworks, barely any traffic . What a stunning day for a ride!

Leg 1 done in just on 12 hours. I’m pleased with that! I refuelled at Pt Augusta and bumped into Sam who was busily shoving food into himself prior to the leg north. We chatted for a few minutes and then I got back on the road.

As I turned right onto the Stuart Highway, I started to go over my ride plan in earnest. This is leg 2 and it’s full of unknowns. How am I feeling? Is the bike running well? whats the wind doing to fuel economy? will I make my next fuel stop of Coober Pedy? And most importantly, when am I going to hit that wall. Keep a keen watch on everything.

The wind plays havoc with my fuel economy, and approaching Glendambo, I decide that discretion is the better part of valor and stop for a splash and dash. Fatman and LTP have just refueled so a quick hello and goodbye and they’re off as I go pay for my fuel.

Not far out of Coober Pedy I’m treated to a magnificent sunset. While I’m busy taking photos, I see what I think is Sam go past. I’ll catch up with him in a tick.

Not too far up the road, I catch up with another rider who’s tucked in behind a road train. Probably not a bad move at this time of evening. We make our way to the servo and begin refueling. I stick my head around the bowser, thinking I’m about to say hello to Sam, only to discover its Derrick that I’ve tailed in. Anyway, a quick bite to eat and Derrick asks of my plans, to which I respond, I aint really got one. Roll out a mat at an IBA hotel when I’m tired. Derrick kindly offers me one of the spare beds in his room at Marla if I want it. Sounds a plan.

We decide to ride together to Marla which suits me as I’m down 1 driving light. We take several short breaks along the way and during one of those breaks, are treated to one of the biggest and brightest shooting stars I’ve ever seen. The things you see when not tucked up on the couch in front of a telly.

Arriving in Marla, we check in and head for the room. Fatman and LTP greet us and then let us know that they’re out due to a stuffed final drive seal. Bugger. We retire to bed with the alarm set for about 5 hours sleep.

And what seemed like 5 minutes is 5 hours later. Derrick asks how I slept. Like a log is my answer. Now apparently we both snore (so we’ve been told) and considering neither of us woke the other, we’ve decided we don’t and will happily report this to anyone who contradicts our scientific findings. That’s our story and we’re sticking to it!

We head off and bump into Wombattle. He joins us for a pleasantly cool and leisurely run to the border where we’re greeted by the first rays of light. We grab a few happy snaps and Wom pushes on with Derrick and me heading off a couple minutes later.

The speed starts to increase and soon enough, Erldunda is in sight. Derrick needs fuel and I need coffee and, why not, that bacon n egg sambo looks good so is added to the menu. I finish my coffee and sambo, wander over to Derrick who’s fiddling with something and bid him farewell, suggesting he’ll catch me on the road.

It’s not long and the taller F700gs gearing I fitted is making easy work of the 130 speed limit up here in the NT. No sooner than I’d settled in for the remaining 200km run to Alice, there is pressing business to deal with and soon enough, a suitable meeting spot comes into view. While busily dealing with the nature of said business, I hear a boxer twin go by, being ridden in an appropriate manner. Seeya somewhere up the road Derrick.

I complete the run into Alice, grab a photo, wave in the general direction of Dads place, wave at Mum as I ride past and make a promise to visit both on my way home. I stop only for fuel and get out of town.

I enjoy the NT speed limit and the ability it gives to cover miles quickly…..and drain fuel tanks with the same gusto. I get the nods around Aileron, some 140km north of Alice. The temps are up and I’ve still got all my thermals on. Time for an immediate break, layer down, something to eat and have a walk around.
With that issue solved, I’m back at it, only to get an Inreach text from Kate informing me that it looks like my refuel at Wauchope has been kyboshed as they have no unleaded. Damn. How to deal with this setback? Go back 30km to Barrow Creek and put in 10 litres? Not ideal as it costs time. Why dont I just tuck in behind a truck for a while and conserve some fuel. That’s a plan and I’m running with it. 60km of discipline later and my fuel range exceeds my distance to run. I overtake the truckie, point at my tank and give him the thumbs up. Hope he understood. Tennant Creek servo is happy enough to sell me 28.2 litres of fuel. Made it with heaps to spare….all 1.8 litres of spare. Note to self. Let’s not do that again hey. Quick break had and back on the road.

350km later I roll into Dunmarra and bump into Derrick. We must stop meeting this way, people are going to talk. We say a quick hello and catch you up the road and Derricks away.

An hour later, I’ve caught and passed Derrick who’s running his own fuel strategy. I’m making the most of my last hour of light. That light is dwindling fast and with it comes skippy. Just little skippy but at 130kph, I reckon he’ll knock me off. Time to back it down to something more sensible for night riding, plus there’s a lot of smoke ahead.

It’s just on dark as I roll into Larrimah, some 200km south of Katherine. The smoke is heavy as I sit on the side of the road, waiting to see if Derrick is going to catch up. After 15 minutes, I’ve had enough of the smoke and push on. Now things get really interesting.

Not far down the road, I encounter the reason for the glow in the sky. Cue the fires. This looks really amazing at nighttime! Just watch for animals escaping the inferno!! Anyway, I figured this wasn’t all bad and I’d cope just fine.

Then I spotted the next glow and it didn’t look anywhere near as inviting.

I continued on then bumped into old mate who’d just driven through the fire front. We chatted for a few minutes and let’s just say, he wasn’t full of enthusiasm, colourfully describing how he’d handle such a catastrophic world ending blaze and the people who started it. I postulated to myself that he’d driven through and as such, I’d be fine if I applied due care.

The smoke got thick and the flames got hot, real hot. My lungs coughed, eyes watered and I was acutely aware of the auxiliary tank on the back that was full of fumes and probably venting in the heat. That white line next to the road was only visible 10 meters in front of me and I kept it in sight….BIG TIME!! It was about this time I thought that maybe there was some merit to old mates tome of death and destruction and this may not have been the brightest thing I’ve ever done. But just like that, I emerged from the fiery flames of hell.

Wow, that was one challenging 100 meters or so (I wasn’t really looking) of flame front!! The smokes thick but I’m coping ok. During this time, my thoughts turned to the others, who, by this stage, have decided that those in front have either made it through unscathed, or are indeed masquerading as BBQ chooks. Their ride reports tell that tale of caution, decisions and team effort. Well done guys. All of you!

An uneventful couple hundred km later, I rolled into the outskirts of Katherine spotting a bike at a servo.
Pulling in I see Spaz having a breather in the carpark. We discuss the fires as I refuel and then see the rest of the crew pull in. There’s been some heavy duty soul searching after that. We’ve plenty of time up our sleeves so enjoy some camaraderie. We catch up with one of the fierys and discover they’re doing backburns. The problem is the wind changed and the fire jumped the road just about where we came through. Not ideal.

Half an hour later and we’re riding to Darwin as a group with various short breaks being taken en-route.
I know exactly where the fuel station is (refueled there many times) and absolutely ignore my (very) irritated GPS who thinks it knows better.

At 01:03am CST, I finish along with the other crazy nutters. Done and dusted. The welcoming committee of Wendy and Richard are full of excitement and congratulations while we take in the what we’ve just achieved. Receipts are grabbed and the all important docs are signed. I think we gave Wendy and Richard writers cramp.

That’s it, time to head to our digs for a well needed shower and sleep.

The next day (was really later in the day) I did some maintenance on the BMW, managed to do a load of washing and then head off and catch up for dinner. Spaz, Sam and I arrived early and didn’t waste too much time in downing some neck oil. I swear I was smiling but must’ve been really tired. Ah well.
Dinner was great. Fantastic to enjoy each others company after such a ride, swapping plenty of stories. The night drew to a close and we all bid each other farewell and good riding. 50CC done. What a buzz!

Tomorrow I start the trip home……..